Do not remain in Silence. Let me Pray.

Psalm109:1
"O God, whom I praise, do not remain silent"

Psalm109:27
"Let them know that it is your hand that you. O Lord, have done it."

(It is a draft post many many months on 18th April 2008, back while reading the book of Psalms)

Prayer:
God, please don't be silent to me. i know i am not perfect and can fall short in so many ways. A lie, my pride, jealousy, lustful eyes. Gorsh! How then can i guard my life pure and holy? Only You, through You and by You. Lord, let me pray. Let me have the willing spirit always availing myself even during the toughest time. i want to be mold by You. So may Your hands come and shape me. i want to be more like You.

Let me pray! I want to be a walking testimony and witness of Your miracle in my life!! Urgh!!

I want to GROW!! Faith is the key!!

Oh Lord.. i really want to grow for You.. i want to bear fruits in numbers and raise up a group of people who truly want see G12 as a vision for the multitudes..

Father, cases i have dealt with.. people i see with my own eyes fallen away.. i somehow lost my faith or even feel inadequate being able to do You proud.. i am falling away too?

In this new season, we broke up into 2 groups wanting and hoping to multiply! God.. can you please show me signs and wonders!! i am really praying for You to move Your mighty hands.. i know it so true that unless You move, i can never move even the smallest stone..

But Jesus, Your word says in Matt 17:20
"I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you"

in 1John 4:4
"..the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world."

So i tell You wat God.. i am going to build my faith and trust onto You again! even as my faith is that small, Jesus you said nothing will be impossible. i want my whole soul, mind and heart to know that! i shall not look into my circumstances! i trust in You! because the one in me is greater than the one in this world!

God, You're in control! I am in command! Let me and everyone of your precious take hold of the authority You had given to us!

i must move in Faith!!

Moving in Faith is a statement that shows God is real and He's good.

Hebrews 11:6
"Without faith is impossible to please God because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him."

My prayer:

Lord, let my faith acknowledges Your presence and Your goodness..

Jesus, help me to move in faith daily.. i want to please You..

There are so many times i thought and i felt i know You well enough.. but the fact is not.. Lord, help me to know You're real as i move in faith.. i want to be connected to You!

God, i want to be a son of Yours!!

God, it's really a big challenge for me to blog with the busy schedules. You know my struggles.. However, i really battle a thought in my mind. i cannot or i don't want.. it makes a big difference..

I always know that You're a God who don't look at how capable a person is, but how willing the person is. You focus on our hearts..

Rom8:19
" The creation waits in eager expectation for the sons of God to be revealed."

Even the creation waits in eager expectation, how much is to say for You my God who waits for the hearts of men to yearn for You..

May Your will be done in me.. ;)

My Life is Yours, Not Mine..

Was reading a book by Pastor David Ong, wrote about His insight and true feelings during the journey of fighting cancer and staying strong glorifying God.

In the book, he mentioned his life is no longer his.. i began to ponder deep..

Indeed, our lives are not longer ours once we received Christ into our lives.. We're been REDEEMED through the work of His at the cross.. Life has never been the same ever i received Jesus into my life.. i cannot deny i am still facing so many struggles and challenges in life, but i definitely can say the way i approach, the value i have, the thoughts in mind are so different compared to the past..

Even this point of time, struggles have been always toiling in my heart and mind everyday i wake up.. i just can't have the faith to see what good hope God can bring about.. Oh Gorsh.. how to stay positive?

When problems come, many will tell us to look ahead for the good and better will come.. Yes, i know it's like telling us to be positive.. It's like just playing ideas in the mind but the feelings in my heart still feel "yucks". Oh God, i just know i am still missing the "catch" to bring forth the peace and joy You can give into me, Lord..

Thus, i decided to look backwards! Upon every single blessings and wonders He did in my life! i am trying to deal my heart issue with God. When looking back at all these, they are true facts i cannot deny that God is God.. Someone who we can never predict what He will and can do in our lives.. i am remembering His goodness in my life! And by doing and recalling all these, i actually open my heart once again to welcome God into me again.

Pinning my hope onto His words again that nv fail.

John4:14
"But whoever drinks the water I give him will never thrist. Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life."

Prayer:
God i am so sorry for being so nasty in my everyday life with the thoughts that i had entertained during my rough patch of time. i know You're always forgiving and always focus on the person rather than the matter.. Just becoz You're so good, this makes me even more terrible.. i ask of You to cleanse my heart.. Let it be always pure and tender for You.. Change my heart oh Lord, let it be ever new! Let my thrist in life be gone as You build that spring of life in me!

I see GRACE!!

i woke up this morning today, many thoughts came into my mind which can easily made me feel i am going to have a lousy or troublesome day. Things like my fyp, quiz, family, ministry, friends' problems.. However i CHOSE to see it differently!

Thousands and hundreds reasons we can think of that tell us we cannot make it. With one reason i can think of that helps me break free is my God, JESUS!!

When i began to focus onto Jesus, i see GRACE!! The greatest gift for He who died to set me free. Free from bondages, self-condemnation. Give me strength and courage to face storms in life.. With thankfulness, i allowed my spirit man to rise up and be BIG for God!!

John 14:1-3
"Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God, trust also in me. In my Father's house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. You know the way to the place where I am going"

Prayer:
Thank You Lord for reminding me the most wonderful gift, Grace.. My life changed so much that i know with my whole heart, it couldn't be my own effort.. It's Your amazing grace that brings me this far! God, i plead that i can always be taught to be humble to know You are the one who leads me, guides me, changes me for the success to come into my life.. Allow me to offer my life to be used by You, to glorify YOUR NAME!! i want to be a true follower, a living walking testimony of Your goodness.. Jesus... i thank You for You love me so SO much! MuacK!! =P

Reign in me Lord! YEAH! =D

Don't Waste Time Away.. Heart of Wisdom..

Currently reading a book that Ej bro gave me as a Christmas present named "Talking the Walk", talking about a pastor's walk with God through cancer.

Came over this verse he mentioned in his book..

Psalm 90:12
"Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom"

It really made me reflect whether am i making full use of my time doing God's work anot.. Am i treasuring my moments while i am still alive.. Actually i have my "limited" time for me to live with, i don't know what will happen next or when God will just take me away. But i definitely believe i have to live differently from now! i must treasure my moments more and be more focus to do more meaningfully things.

Oh Jesus, so many times i easily got caught up with the problems and personal desire that blinded my focus of God's purpose in me.. You're so steadfast and focus onto God's work, nv were You caught slacking or being lazy. This is because You always remember God's purpose for You. Therefore You treasured every moment You had to do God's work. Teach me! Give me the heart of wisdom to be quick to respond and do what is necessary. i want to be more like You! i don't want to regret living my life not to the fullest for Your purpose in me.

Guide me Lord.. PLEASE.. =D

I want to be more like YOU!! =D

Last thurday, i was late meeting up ej bcoz a foreigner was lost and needed direction at my LRT station.. No hesitation, i helped him, especially this year God is teaching us to love ya NEIGHbour(everyone) as ourselves..

Today was even more amazing!! i met the same "foreigner" in MRT!! haha.. initally i wasn't aware of him until he came over and asked me how to go to the AIRport from sengkang MRT.. i was completely shocked but with a calm face, i offered that he can sit with me to outram while i also need to be there to change train for school. this time round, i talked to him and got to know him that he's leaving singapore for his country. he smiled at me, i smiled at him. we communicated freely even there's some barrer.. actually, kinda missed him when we parted.. lol.. =D

i believe God, You're trying to tell me something.. teach me something..

Helping a same person twice is more than special. i believe God, You're reminding me to be constantly do good to people as i did set some faith goals about helping my brothers to rise up and reaching out to my friends by blessing them..

Gal6:10
"Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers"

Continue to do good bcoz..

Gal6:9
"Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up."

Lord, i want to reap a harvest for YOU, not for myself!! allow me to draw closer to You and be used by YOU!!

Jiayou Alvin Ong Khiaw Chong! Jesus Yi Ji BANG!! =D

Glory be to God!!

today had a meet up with ej.. wah!! a long time since we two can really sit down and catch up.. i am glad to know this great guy of God.. he inspired me lots and encouraged me lots..

3 years back.. i told myself this "EEeee yer!! who is this!! y CHUP so much into my life" but found myself growing so much under his guidance and mentorship..

i looked back and find all these so impossible.. it's You oh Lord!! thanks for giving me strength to decide to open my life and be TRANSPARENT TOTALLY..

i can still rember the words i told him that even as our relationship is not close, i want to be SUCK his power for God.. lol.. and our journey of friendship/mentorship/discipleship started from there.. Thanks for putting him ahead of my journey, Lord..

Bcoz of my past and also i am serious about growing and building my foundation, i gave up alot of things! being serious in growing, i told myself i cannot live a double life.. in church one pattern, outside pattern more than badmington.. understanding i got old friends and circumstances that will jio jio me back to my old self. Thanks God for sending ej into my life to guard me and help me..

Lord, You always want to build us, Your people.. but can we put away all those foolish acts of living a double life? i want breakthroughs in my life Lord.. i need miracles!! teach me not to play God but let You rule over me.. there're so much more for me to catch up my life for You! Live in me Lord.. allow me to glorify You with my life..

1Cor 13:11
"When i was a child, i talked like a child, i thought like a child, i reasoned like a child. When i became a man, i put childish ways behind me."

Glory be to YOU Lord!!